I wish Geraldine DeRuiter had written a memoir or personal essay collection instead of trying to shoehorn facts into her book of essays. The connection between the topic, the some sort of personal story she’d include and the facts she footnotes was often very tenuous. She does not seem to be an academic, a reporter or have experience researching any topic. Which is fine, but then just make it a memoir!

She spends a lot of time hinting at a bad childhood without really exploring it. Either tell us about it or not—and I’d understand not—but being coy about it is tedious. Same with her health problems. It’s fine not to give the details but then why mention it at all? It only makes people curious about what is being left out and what she included did not add much, if anything, to the book and would not have been missed.

I feel like the book was supposed to be funny but the “humor” felt so forced. I lost track of how many times she tells a story that involves her yelling at her husband or being rude in some way. Hopefully that is hyperbole? Is it supposed to be funny? Relatable? I think it is but is yelling at your spouse a funny bit in 2024?

I found it odd that she shoehorned in her exact height and weight in one of the several sections about double standards and fatphobia. Why did we need to know that? Why does she keep reminding us that fat people are people too? It came off as a concept she personally struggles with a lot which may well be true but I’m sure that is not the impression she wanted to give. 

Is she a food writer? She does seem to cook a bit from recipes but I don’t get the impression she knows much about food except that she has ample money (she reminds us of this frequently) to travel and eat a lot of very expensive meals. She didn’t talk much about any food journalism she had done beyond her post about the cinnamon rolls and Mario Batali if there has been any.

The title is a bit ironic now after her X/Twitter tirade against the NYT review which I read a gifted link to—I’m not a subscriber so I can’t do the same for you.

After all the hate she repeatedly reminds us in the book that she gets online you’d think she’d have some better coping skills or someone to tell her to let it go and let vent privately.

I do think it must be rough to get a lot of hate from people over very basic “I voted for Hillary” white feminism 101 views but I wouldn’t conflate those comments with that of the reviewer or illustrator. Not everyone is out to attack you, even if they didn’t like your book and I’d be stunned if the illustrator read any of it.